DEAR MISS MANNERS: My spouse’s finest buddy from highschool, “Nelly,” has develop into a really profitable businesswoman.
Every year, she’s going to invite us to the autumn fundraiser for the native performing arts society, which raises funds for theater teams. She is going to purchase a desk of eight for this occasion and invite us to hitch her.
The occasion has each silent and stay auctions, and different alternatives to donate cash, together with a meal and a brief play from one of many theater teams the group helps.
Many of the attendees are individuals with the best social standing in our neighborhood, with the cash to match. The quantity individuals spend on the silent and stay auctions, for my part, is ridiculous. For instance, $1,500 for a vineyard tour and tasting the place you get to pick two bottles of wine; a “movie night” basket with in all probability $25 price of things that sells for $200; and so forth.
If individuals have the cash to spend on this method, I’ve no subject with that, as it’s for a very good trigger. However my spouse and I are in no place financially to even bid on these things, not to mention to have the successful bid. Even the silent public sale gadgets have a better minimal bid than we’d be prepared to spend.
Each couple (or individual, if single) is registered and given a bidding paddle with a quantity. Nelly has stated a number of instances that we’re friends of hers and are underneath no obligation to bid on or purchase something.
However then we acquired a letter from the group’s president. The letter was eloquent, however the gist of it was, “Our records show you haven’t bid on anything the last several years, and you have never contributed to any of our other fundraising requests. A lot of effort and money is put into this event. We request that you find a way to excuse yourself next year so that somebody who is willing to support the group can attend. Don’t let Nelly know I contacted you.”
How would you reply to this?
GENTLE READER: By giving the letter to Nelly and telling her that you’re mortified: that you just by no means meant to trigger her any points with the performing arts society; you have been all the time grateful and pleased to attend; and you’ll, in fact, willingly — if sadly — excuse your self from subsequent yr’s occasion to make room for somebody who has the means to bid on gadgets.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m an expat residing in a tropical nation. Native fruits are plentiful and low cost, so cocktails stuffed with contemporary fruit are on practically each menu.
How do I partake? Simply drink the liquid and throw away the remaining? Use the straw as a single chopstick to dredge the fruit as much as the rim? Tip the cup again and attempt to “drink” the remaining fruit with out choking on ice?
I’m sitting with a crushed pineapple drink now, and I’m positive my method was not that of a real Light Reader.
GENTLE READER: Forks are typically simpler, if recovering the fruit is that necessary. Simply remember that almost all tropical international locations begin serious about transport the expats dwelling once they see them consuming the fruit however discarding the cocktail.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her e-mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by means of postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
