James Van Der Beek has opened up in regards to the heartbreaking means his ongoing battle with Stage 3 colorectal most cancers has affected his marriage – revealing the prognosis has left him feeling like he can’t present for his spouse and 6 youngsters.
The “Dawson’s Creek” actor first introduced his prognosis in November 2024, and he mentioned his stunning well being battle additional in an Instagram clip revealed Saturday after his forty eighth birthday.
The video, titled “What Cancer Taught Me,” started with Van Der Beek telling his greater than 1.6 million followers how this previous yr “has been the hardest of my life.”
“When I was younger, I used to define myself as an actor, which was never all that fulfilling, and then I became a husband and it was much better and then I became a father and that was the ultimate,” the “Dawson’s Creek” star mentioned.
“All of those definitions that I cared so deeply about were stripped from me,” he continued after explaining he was pressured to be away from his household whereas present process therapy.
“I was away for treatment, so I could no longer be a husband who was helpful to my wife,” Van Der Beek mentioned. “I could no longer be a father who could pick up his kids and put them to bed and be there for them. I could not be a provider because I wasn’t working.”
“I was faced with the question, ‘If I am just a too-skinny, weak guy, alone in an apartment with cancer, what am I?’”
Nevertheless, the “Varsity Blues” actor’s worries weren’t long-lived as a result of he in the end turned to faith to assist ease his troubled thoughts.
“I am worthy of God’s love simply because I exist,” he mentioned. “And if I’m worthy of God’s love, shouldn’t I also be worthy of my own?”
“As I move through this healing portal toward recovery,” Van Der Beek continued, “I wanted to share that with you because that revelation that came to me was in no small part to all the prayers and the love that had been directed toward me.”
The ailing star then known as on his thousands and thousands of followers to comply with the identical message he shared – even when it felt “too religious” for some.
“I certainly don’t claim to know what God is or explain God, my efforts to connect to God are an ongoing process that is a constant unfolding mystery to me,” he famous.
“But, if it’s a trigger that feels too religious, you can take the word God out in your mind and it can simply be ‘I am worthy of love.’ Because you are.”
Van Der Beek married his spouse, Kimberly Van Der Beek, in 2010 shortly after divorcing Heather McComb. The pair have daughters Olivia, Annabel, Emilia, and Gwendolyn, and sons Joshua and Jeremiah.
He first introduced his most cancers prognosis in an announcement to Folks.
“I have colorectal cancer,” he mentioned on the time. “I’ve been privately dealing with this diagnosis and have been taking steps to resolve it, with the support of my incredible family.”
Van Der Beek added, “There’s reason for optimism, and I’m feeling good.”
The “Labor Day” actor additionally lately mentioned his most cancers battle in January in a put up celebrating his father’s birthday.
Van Der Beek shared that his father has remained considered one of his strongest supporters amid his well being woes.
“The way you have shown up when I’ve been down and out this year – without us having to ask, without the expectation of even a thank you… has been not just life-saving, but life affirming,” he wrote about his dad.
“I’m blown away by how you’ve been there for me emotionally as I’ve moved through everything cancer brings up,” the actor added. “I know it’s outside your comfort zone, but especially since Mom died, you have come through for me again and again and again in ways that I didn’t even know how much I needed.”
He additionally wrote: “I feel so proud and lucky to have come from you. Thank you for being the best. Ever. Period.”