DEAR MISS MANNERS: My pricey neighbor commonly walks their canine on our pretty distant suburban streets, which don’t have sidewalks, counter to the really helpful methodology: They stroll with site visitors slightly than dealing with it.
In addition they stroll with earbuds, listening to who is aware of what, making it troublesome to listen to site visitors coming behind them.
I’ve gently identified that it’s the regulation, and safer, to stroll dealing with site visitors to allow them to see the vehicles coming. Their reply is that “the dog tells me when cars are coming.”
The canine walks to their left, into the site visitors lane, additional endangering the animal.
Sure, motorists are cautious after they go my neighbor on the highway, however in addition they should be nervous that the walker doesn’t absolutely acknowledge them.
I sincerely care about this individual and don’t wish to see them (or the canine) harm. How can I impress upon them to comply with the foundations on strolling safely?
GENTLE READER: You could have tried. Now you’re going to must hope for the perfect — and keep in mind that each etiquette and private autonomy permit your neighbor to make their very own selections.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I obtained a bunch electronic mail from a youthful member of the family that included all the relations of my technology, and a few youthful. The topic was a beloved aunt who handed away years in the past.
Apparently, this younger man had been doing a little ancestry analysis, and despatched the household a few of his outcomes concerning my aunt. It was crammed with police studies and information tales concerning a violent and traumatic expertise that my aunt suffered when she was younger.
It was devastating to study of this. Her personal kids knew nothing of their mom’s expertise.
I really feel that this was an extremely intrusive act, and might’t think about what his motivation was in sharing data that my aunt fairly clearly wished to be saved personal.
I’ve by no means responded, and I can’t consider a well mannered approach to take action.
GENTLE READER: This dialog goes to contain correcting the younger man’s manners — one thing that may solely be correctly achieved by a father or mother or different individual with related standing. Due to this fact, the primary query so that you can reply will not be “how?” however “who?”
As soon as you understand that, you may then ask that individual to talk with him, saying that if you are certain his intentions have been good, his actions have been inconsiderate.
As you mentioned, the aunt clearly didn’t share the knowledge herself as a result of she wished it saved personal. Somebody must alert him each to what he did and to the truth that, going ahead, he must be extra discreet.
Some follow-up communication, apologizing for his indiscretion, is probably going vital.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is there a phrase for a married couple’s dad and mom to name one another?
All of us reside comparatively shut to one another and go to semi-regularly. Nobody I’ve requested has a solution. Possibly you may provide you with one thing. I don’t actually wish to name them my “out-laws.”
GENTLE READER: Precise names often work.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her electronic mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by way of postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
