DEAR ABBY: I’ve been buddies with “Ted” for just a little over a 12 months.
We’re collectively quite a bit — almost day-after-day. I spend time at his home, and we frequently go to the park or exit to eat collectively.
In all this time he has by no means requested to develop into buddies on Fb, though I’ve hinted about it to him just a few instances.
Yesterday, we had been each just a few glasses of sangria in when he started displaying me photographs from his Fb web page. Once I requested him why we weren’t Fb buddies, he modified the topic. Once I advised him it hurts my emotions that he doesn’t wish to be Fb buddies, he acquired indignant and wouldn’t acknowledge my query.
The night was over after that.
This isn’t the primary time I’ve expressed concern over one thing, and it’s additionally not the primary time he has refused to acknowledge my emotions over one thing like this. What ought to I do?
— LIMITED FRIEND IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR LIMITED FRIEND: I don’t know why Ted prefers to cover his Fb content material and neither do you. Folks have a proper to some privateness.
If the one glimpses of his FB are these he shares with you on his cellphone, there could also be photographs there that he prefers you not see. This might additionally clarify why he’s adamant about not discussing it.
What you might want to do now could be resolve how vital this situation is to you and act accordingly.
DEAR ABBY: I’ve two sisters. Our mom handed away final 12 months after a nasty fall. I used to be her main caretaker and was along with her day-after-day.
My sisters weren’t chatting with her in any respect, which harm her deeply. She had dementia however nonetheless missed them and would discuss them usually. It was all very unhappy.
When Mother died, my older sister wouldn’t inform her goodbye. She didn’t attend the funeral and stated to everybody who would pay attention that she wasn’t unhappy. My youthful sister arrived late for the funeral.
Afterward, they attacked me — screaming, cursing, and so on. They had been indignant over small issues, like the truth that I used my older sister’s maiden title in a draft of Mother’s obituary.
I minimize them off and have stopped chatting with them and to the remainder of the household. I would like no particulars about my life getting again to them, giving them cause to assault me once more.
The issue is that my complete household is now gone. I’m so unhappy. Not solely did I lose my mom, however everybody else as nicely.
Ought to I method them?
— WORSE THAN GRIEF IN GEORGIA
DEAR WORSE: I might advise towards approaching your sisters once more, for the explanations you acknowledged.
In the event you want to contact prolonged household, attain out with the understanding that something you inform them will possible drift again to your sisters.
As a result of your siblings are so disagreeable, it could make extra sense so that you can focus your energies on deepening the friendships you’ve got with others.
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
