DEAR ABBY: I’m a senior girl and have been in a relationship for 5 months with a widower. His spouse died three years in the past.
He calls me each evening, and we see one another three to 4 occasions every week.
My problem is that he’s low cost. He makes 3 times what I do however takes me out just for bar meals meals. I wish to say one thing, however I’m unsure how. He’s an incredible man apart from this, however I don’t wish to keep if he doesn’t worth me extra.
Ought to I inform him he’s too low cost or simply break it off?
— UNDERVALUED IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR UNDERVALUED: No, don’t do both.
Inform him you are feeling a continuing weight-reduction plan of bar meals isn’t the healthiest, and also you wish to attempt one thing totally different. Then ask him to make a reservation at a restaurant.
If he balks, volunteer that maybe you could possibly break up the fee. His response to that may inform you whether or not to stay with him or not.
DEAR ABBY: My spouse and I’ve not had intercourse for the final 4 years.
I’m not an ideal husband. I’ve made my share of errors — not all the time telling the reality, texting different ladies — and she or he has her share of imperfections as nicely. She has hit me on multiple event. She has additionally pulled a gun on me and stole $1,400.
And but, I discover myself placing all that apart and transferring ahead.
I do love my spouse, however proper now I’m at my breaking level. Do you will have any recommendation?
— AT WITS’ END IN TEXAS
DEAR WITS’ END: Since you love your spouse and wish to keep married, inform her that. Whilst you’re at it, supply her the chance to work out your variations by marriage counseling.
If she agrees, will probably be an enormous leap in the correct route. Nevertheless, if she doesn’t, on your personal security, you two should separate. The connection you will have described is risky, unhealthy and unsafe for you.
DEAR ABBY: My stepdaughter died tragically this 12 months, struck by a driver whereas on her morning stroll. She leaves behind a husband and 4 youngsters underneath the age of 18.
Their marriage ceremony anniversary is developing, and we used to ship a card and cash. What could be acceptable for me to do for our son-in-law? I wish to ship a card letting him know I’m pondering of him, however don’t know the phrases to say.
— STUMPED IN MINNESOTA
DEAR STUMPED: Please settle for my deepest sympathy for the lack of your stepdaughter. As a result of her husband is household, I don’t suppose sending a card could be sufficient.
Decide up the cellphone, begin a dialog and inform him he’s in your and your partner’s ideas and also you need him to comprehend it. Sending an anniversary card to somebody whose partner has lately died won’t be as useful as lending a keen ear.
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
