DEAR ABBY: I’m a single father or mother, and my youngsters’ grandfather (my father-in-law) has supplied to look at them at his home as soon as per week.
I might like to take him up on it as a result of it could assist me sustain with all of my duties. However I hesitate as a result of he wasn’t an concerned father, so he has no parenting expertise.
For instance, he struggles with battle administration between the youngsters (and his personal mood). He has no sense; I don’t belief he is aware of what or when to feed the youngsters. Additionally, his home is a whole mess — he by no means throws something away.
My youngsters take pleasure in spending time with him, and we don’t have a lot household, so I’d prefer to foster their relationships.
How do I maximize the nice and decrease the unhealthy of their visits? How do I assist him doing the very best by my youngsters with out me being overbearing?
— MOM WITH HELP
DEAR MOM: A number of the points you increase might be resolved by merely speaking to your father-in-law and telling him how you resolve conflicts between the youngsters, what you need them fed and when.
A messy home is completely different from one that might have a unfavourable impression upon their well being. How unhealthy is it? Does the place pose a hazard to your youngsters? Is it potential that he might babysit at your own home relatively than his?
Concerning his mood, nonetheless, are you completely certain he received’t abuse your youngsters if he loses it? If the reply to that query isn’t any, then babysitting can’t be allowed.
DEAR ABBY: I’ve been seeing a hairstylist for a decade. Over the last couple of years, I don’t really feel I’ve gotten the service I deserve.
I’m going in for a trim about each two months (typically longer to economize). She is extraordinarily busy and typically delegates “green” hairstylists to scrub and blow-dry my hair.
I admire that she provides new hairstylists an opportunity to get expertise, however final time two completely different folks labored on my hair along with her, and it took an hour and a half for a easy trim. On high of that, she charged me an additional $10, plus I prefer to tip everybody correctly (just a little one thing for the associates, with 20% going to her).
Typically, she’s just a little late for appointments. And the final time I requested for a unique coiffure, she gave pushback as a result of “I wouldn’t take care of it.”
I’m prepared to maneuver on to somebody new and a brand new coiffure.
What’s the correct strategy to break up together with your hairstylist? I wish to do it in particular person, however it could possibly be awkward, and he or she might get offended. Ought to I give an additional tip?
— HAIRY SITUATION IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR HAIRY SITUATION: You aren’t this stylist’s good friend; you’re her consumer. You may have each proper to vary stylists, and also you shouldn’t really feel responsible for doing so.
Should you really feel you need to give her a motive, inform her the reality on the telephone or in particular person.
You might be inside your rights to make a change if you want. It shouldn’t create ailing emotions, and also you don’t have to offer her a farewell tip.
[The hairstylist breakup is, apparently, a common problem.]
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
