DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m the occasion supervisor at a really horny and classy nightclub. We host enjoyable events each week.
We now have a daily visitor who is completely smitten with me, however he’s not my kind.
I really feel obligated to cordially socialize with him every time I see him, as a result of customer support requirements at my job.
On the subject of relationships, I firmly imagine we’re all entitled to our personal preferences; nobody ought to power any form of relationship — bodily or in any other case — for any motive.
Fortunately, my employers agree with that. We now have a really robust tradition of consent with reference to any liaisons that occur because of being at our membership.
The visitor in query is completely respectful of this protected environment, and has been very gracious after I decline his advances. But he continues to flirt with me.
Whereas I’ve been capable of dodge his advances to this point, I can’t maintain this up eternally. It’s merely exhausting.
How do I flip him down and preserve the social relationship? To be honest, he’s a nice gentleman — very candy, really. Simply not my kind.
GENTLE READER: It might shock you to listen to that Miss Manners doesn’t share your good opinion of your employers.
Out of your description, it sounds just like the interactions between buyer and worker on the membership are, the truth is, a key a part of the success of their enterprise.
But your employers assert, and also you settle for, that these interactions are totally social. This burdens you with the entire work of preserving clients in line, whereas absolving your employers of any duty. That is, at greatest, naive, however in all probability very harmful.
It’s time to inform your employers that you just want help with this explicit buyer.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I typically share a bottle of wine at a restaurant. After the primary glass, he doesn’t anticipate the server, simply pours himself extra.
He’ll exit of his approach to end the bottle, even when it means overfilling his glass. He responds to my shocked look with, “If you want any more, you can drink from my glass.”
I believe that is extremely impolite. What ought to I do?
GENTLE READER: In distinction to rolling stones, repeated sources of friction in relationships have a tendency to collect all kinds of stray detritus. So allow us to mud this one off.
Miss Manners believes you agree that it isn’t a criminal offense to complete the bottle of wine you ordered. She additional assures you that refilling the glasses yourselves, with out the assistance of the waiter, is suitable.
You have been dismayed on the sight of your husband overfilling his glass, and whereas his retort was impolite sufficient, it adopted your shocked look, reasonably than having preceded it.
Was he impolite, then, to not refill your glass alongside along with his personal? Sure. What it’s best to do is to say, “Dearest, next time, would you please refill my glass when you refill your own?”
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her e-mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by means of postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
